Making amends

In case anyone is worried about me, please don’t. I’m actually doing much better. In writing the previous article, I was able to sort through a lot of my feelings on the matter. That’s the beauty of keeping a journal like this; I have the opportunity to sit down and examine a situation more thoroughly than if I just scream to myself through an explosion of tears.

I talked to M at noontime and am trying to move forward with… whatever. I don’t know what this is all going to turn into, but I know that, by law, I have no rights to anything I’ve done or will do with the production company unless he’s willing to sign those papers—and who wants him to sign them unless he wants to? If he really wanted this, he would have already done it. In essence, I think it’s for the best. I intend to approach any future projects that we do together as “work for hire”, not as the true partnership I had hoped for.

I realize this isn’t a perfect situation, and it’s not going to work for me in the long run. I’m settling. But, for now, it keeps the peace, so I’m okay with that. Sometimes, you just want quiet (even if it is temporary).

I am going to get my resume together and concentrate on the job front. If I can pour all my focus on getting a new job and getting a new career—or maybe, my own business—started, that will distract me from M and the disappointment I feel. And, it’ll improve my life in the process!